I had meant to complete and share about something entirely different (and perhaps a bit more joyful) today but alas, that was not the directive. Maybe because we have come to that point in the astrological season where the ostensible balance, rationality, and diplomacy of the cardinal air sign of Libra begins to give way to what I will argue is the real work of the Libra season. That is, to be the breeze that wisps around and then slowly picks up and the wind that gusts, howls, and whisks us into the submarine canyon of Scorpio season. Yes, that’s where we’re headed. And this year, on the way, we will traverse an solar eclipse. This is Libra energy – that which initiates and commences our journey into the depths. Ready?
Nope? Me neither. And so I sense that this is why I am sharing what I am today: a bit of intel from my channel to yours from the suite of Swords – the suite of air and of underworld journeys.
The Two of Swords keeps showing up in my pulls. It has been repeating over the last couple of weeks and so I know that there is something here that I am being invited to attend to. So much so that even the CHANI app is trolling me.
After I pulled The Two of Swords again earlier this week, I was brought back to what I had written during a previous encounter. Here I imagine that I am the person present in the image of this card – blindfolded, at peace, protected by two ready swords. So if I am that person, this is what I have to say…
I see clearly what the damage is and now I must decide what I will do about it. The Two of Swords meets me here. I know enough now to understand that I do not have to walk alone but I also understand that I will have to choose the path for myself. As important as it will be to draw near to my sources of support – the other people, places, beings, and things that resource me – in the end, only I can know how to heal.
Indeed, I am responsible for myself and only for myself, even as I make myself accountable to all with whom I am in relationship. It feels like an impossibly fine line tow: to remain interdependent and connected and still responsible and accountable in my own right. Yes, I must be – I deserve to be – nourished and supported by what is outside. Yet, I must reckon with the reality that I can only make aligned decisions from within the boundaries of my own body. My choices must come from within my own deep and wise knowing. The Two of Swords reminds me of this. It is confronting and I can’t say that I like it but I know I must face it.
How much easier it would be if I could be fixed by another; if someone or someplace or something else could provide me with the step-by-step instructions for how to flush out, dress, and close up what hurts. If only there were a healer or a pilgrimage or a retreat that could do this work for me and that could tell me exactly what to do. But that is not the nature of things, is it? These are questions that are for me and me alone.
It is not easy to decide for myself what I will do and which way I will go while, at the same time, remaining soft and responsive to those around me, to those who both need me and who want to give to me. I recognize that the messages that I have received about how to be a human in relationship with other human and more-than-human kin rarely, if ever, have touched into the undulating continuum of relationship that exists between enmeshment and rugged individualism. I am still learning that there are other ways of being with others. It is not easy but if I stay with it, I have a sense that I will be offered freedom. Freedom, the “ethical expansion of what we’re capable of – what we’re able to do and feel together.”
My sense is that this is what the suite of Swords is all about: going downwards and inwards into the underworld so that we can shed what must be shed and heal what must be healed so that we can become free.
Two of Swords reminds me again that I must decide for myself what to do about these wounds. I must choose if I am to do anything at all (I can certainly choose not to) and if I am, how I will go about healing the damage they’ve done. But even from inside of the furthest recesses of myself, I am not actually alone. I am inside of my body and from here I am constantly receiving information. This too is a relationship. It is likely that just by listening, really listening, to this, I will have what I need. What’s more is that from here I am reminded of where my wisdom comes from – from the DNA of my Ancestors that has encoded every cell of my being and from the subtle whispers of guidance that I am able to pick up from beyond. The images, tingles, shivers, and clear knowings that are always incoming. Yes, I will know what to do.
So for a time I will tie on this blindfold and I will protect my space, my time, my aliveness.